La Voz de Dios

I can clearly remember that night when Kuya Marvin and I were talking at the parish office. I was told to get a piece of paper as we were going to hold a one-on-one meeting. Next thing I knew, I was jotting down notes about a certain production plan about the exposition of the bells of Meycauayan. "Many churchgoers have never been to the belfry so let's take this chance to bring this hidden place to them," he said. I chuckled as I just rode on his trip. 

I should have known that he was being totally serious about it. 

Believe it or not, it was more than grueling preparing for it. Well, it didn't look exactly difficult but somehow, there was this heavy weight put on our shoulders when we committed ourselves to it. Personally speaking, I was overwhelmed with how it all turned out to be. We held shoots, editing sessions, and whatnots. We even pulled an all-nighter designing the whole venue.

And boy was it so fulfilling when it opened on September 28. 

So the main focus on the exhibit are the historic bells which had been in the parish for over three centuries already. Named San Jose, San Francisco and Maria Concepcion, these bells can still be found (and are still being used to this date) at the belfry which was erected on 1800 as per the order of Fray Francisco Gascueña, OFM. 

As for the belfry itself, it is considered one of the cultural treasures of Meycauayan and the rest of Bulacan. Aside from the fact that it is the belfry of one of the oldest churches in the province, it is also one of the only two remaining belfries in the Philippines which is connected to the main church building by a stone bridge. 

Certainly, this piece of trivia is one reason why I am so proud to be under the Parish of St. Francis of Assisi in Meycauayan.

However, the belfry is in no good condition anymore. Although the main edifice still stands strong, foliage are threatening its exterior. The interior is pretty much ruined too by dirt and too much vandalism. The bells are in no good conditions too, especially Maria Concepcion, one of the most beautifully-sounding bells in the province then.

It is the primary objective of La Voz de Dios to collect enough money to fund the restoration of the belfry. I took part on the whole team because I really wanted this cause to begin. I have always insisted that for people to advance, they have to look back on their history. The belfry is a huge part of Meycauayan's past and we all have the responsibility to take care of it, as parishioners.

Aside from the bells and the belfry, La Voz de Dios also featured the history of the actual church of the Parish of St. Francis of Assisi. Rare pictures of the structure as it gets transformed through time were displayed for everyone to see. Culture buffs would surely enjoy looking at it, discovering new things, about a place not everybody would have thought to mean so much, history-wise.

I'm not being a suck-off or anything but I really think we at the Parish Commission on Youth and the Parish Committee on Church Cultural Heritage really did a great job on this one. I honestly believe that to draw people to faith, there has to be something shallow that would attract them to it. I know this sounds ridiculous but I remember what our Religion teacher in HS said: "Let people find something they like in one thing you want them to always do. When it becomes a habit, then you take the next step by instilling in their minds what their actual purpose for doing it should be."

In my honest opinion, the exposition of the church's history could have instilled a sense of importance towards the parishioners. I won't deny that I grew more fond of my parish when I learned how colorful its history has always been. I guess this only applies to culture buffs like I am but I think the thought has become a stepping stone for some to actually practice their faith. And hopefully when they do, it will turn into something bigger that would strengthen their Catholicism more.

It has been more than a week since we opened La Voz de Dios; and we think it was too short. That is why we decided to extend it until we think we've reached enough people. If you guys are coming to Meycauayan, I wish you would stop by the Parish of St. Francis of Assisi in Poblacion, and at least take a glimpse of the wonderful heritage and history of our humble church.

La Voz de Dios

Weekdays: 8AM-5PM

Weekends: 7AM-8PM

St. Francis, Here are Thy Servants...

the teacher. the writer. the hotelier. the government worker. the banker. the priest (hehe).

I know I should be blogging about what happened yesterday; but to be honest, ideas won't flow well until I get to write about the people behind the event. I haven't slept well yet but excitement rushes in so please just excuse me if I'm gonna come up with a mess or sound like I'm kissing my own ass in this article.

Anyway, in the picture above is the Documentation and Design Team of the recently concluded Feast of St. Francis of Assisi. We were the ones responsible for La Voz de Dios, the exhibit about the Meycauayan belfry and its bells. We were also the ones in charge of taking pictures and videos, and some design stuffs needed for the event.

We are a team, but more than that... we are friends.

To be honest, the whole preparation season for the feast day wasn't as smooth as everyone must have thought. We ran out of time. We ran out of ideas. We ran out of physical energy. But I guess, when you offer your distraught, sufferings, and fatigue to give back and strengthen your faith with your friends who have the same endeavor, things will eventually fall into its proper places.

Up to this point that I haven't actually slept that much yet, it still feels amazing how we got to do what we did yesterday and the past months. If I had not been involved with these people,  I wonder if I could even get to come up with something as grand as what we planned. Friends really do help each other, and in our case, one is just so essential. 

I know a lot of things had happened yesterday but I still feel thankful to God and to St. Francis that I got the chance to take part in this exciting milestone of the parish. More than that, I feel intensely grateful that I got the chance to work with Kuya Ron (not in the picture), Kuya Marvin, Sir Robby, Celine, Luwi and Tina for something as big as this. 

Reality

Obviously, I was too busy with real life that I wasn't able to write about my regular monthly goal. And no, I'm not extending GRACE because I realized that there's just no point on it. I mean, I do want to be graceful but I think that would need all year round to master. Plus, I think it's something I cannot force to happen. I am a very loud and outgoing person, I guess I should keep it that way. 

And so I'll name October, 'REALITY'.

Here's one major principle of mine: YOU ONLY BECOME A TRUE PERSON WHEN YOU'RE REAL. Pretensions suck and would just lead you to nowhere so it's better to be who you actually are. You won't feel the burden of pleasing others, because everything you will do will be in coherence to your will. No pressure.

I also think that people should all learn to accept a certain reality intended for them. (Read destiny.) In my case, it's the fact that I'm not rich and KPOP is merely a sideline of entertainment. I have allowed six years of my life to happen around its world that I almost thought it's my reality. Hence, the idea that it is my happiness.

But it's just gonna be what it is - source of entertainment, distraction, alternative.

I guess I owe to 'growing old'. I guess six years had been enough and now I almost don't pay attention anymore. Well, I still do treasure it, as well as the friendships I made, but I suppose I just realized that there are bigger priorities in life that I should actually spend on.

And that's the real 'reality' where family and future exists.

So this October, I'll be focusing on what I actually am as a person and not on who I want myself to be. Like any other months, this is going to be a challenge but something in me dictates - and I know - that I can manage.

Goodbye Luhan... I Love You.

After less than just three months of giving me joy, excitement, love and comfort, Luhan passed away just a few minutes ago. I am actually shaking at the moment. He's my most favorite puppy (hence, the name) among Chichi and Skippy's babies and he died because of Distemper and Parvo viruses.

I can't stop myself from sobbing right now. It was very heart-wrecking seeing him in that state for just three days. His health deteriorated rapidly, not giving me a chance to prepare myself. His convulsive seizures was the most painful to see, and what's worse was I couldn't do anything. We brought him to the veterinarian for vaccination in an attempt to somehow control the virus, but it was all too late. It affected his brain to the point that he's crying because of the pain...

And then he succumbed.

When the seizures won't stop and he started pooping and peeing unconsciously, I was convinced that he's gonna leave. And then one thing just came to my mind: I CAN'T LEAVE HIS SIDE. 

Way way back before I even got Chichi, I came across this picture of a blog post saying that when our dogs are dying, we shouldn't leave their side. They've entrusted and offered their whole lives to us as their masters and the last thing we could do is to let them feel that we appreciate them up to the last moments. In Luhan's case, he was with me for barely three months only; but he had been a constant comfort. 

He loved me like family. And I know.

I know it irks some people whenever I act like this. To them, it's crazy that I treat dogs like human beings - to the point that I have chosen to spend the rest of my life with them, than with a husband. But you know what? They are like humans. They can feel. They can understand. 

And I have proven that.

As we stuck with him as he was dying, my brother showed him a video of his siblings taken from the house of their new master. I can tell he was looking at it. I can tell he was watching at it. And somehow, it makes me feel better that at least, he got to see his siblings before he left.

And you know what proves me most that they're just like human?

Luhan listened to me.

During the past three days, I can tell Luhan was fighting - because I constantly tell him not to leave. Even my mom tells him everyday, as she caresses him to sleep, that he should fight because she doesn't want him to leave. 

And believe it or not, Luhan did. Even the veterinarian said that he was lucky to have reached such kind of state despite all the sufferings. He wouldn't have lasted three days if he didn't fight. 

But when I saw him suffering already as the seizures won't stop, I told him to just give up... that we're all gonna be okay. And you know what? After a few minutes, he stopped breathing. His eyes were still open and I couldn't stop crying. I touched his body which rapidly gone stiff and cold. 

And then I left, no longer able to take the sight of my baby lying lifelessly in the carpet. As I went upstairs, I mumbled a little prayer to St. Francis at St. Roque, thanking them - despite the pain - for ending Luhan's sufferings already. 

No matter how much people think that I'm crazy for loving dogs so much, I don't care; because after all, dogs give me more happiness than any human being could. Because my dogs, until their last breath, will love me with all their hearts.

And no other person could do that.

Fearing the Possibility

So at the moment, my heart is in despair. Three of my dogs (Chichi, Skippy and Luhan) are in a critical condition after contracting Parvo and Distemper viruses. Chichi and Skippy are both adults already so their immune system are kinda stronger although I know they're really suffering...

But Luhan... Luhan is just a three-month old puppy. He's my favorite among the two other dogs' pups. I made that obvious when I gave him that name. Luhan is my most favorite member of EXO and I promised that if I have a new dog, I'll be using his name.

But now, my Luhan is dying.

I'm trying to hold in my tears as I type this. It hurts my heart to know that I'm this (-) close to losing my puppy. His immune system is rapidly deteriorating and I can't do anything. It pains me so much that I can't do anything. Even the veterinarian admitted that there's a small chance that he'll survive... as well as my two other babies.

Now, I know most of you are kinda looking at me like I'm one silly person who would cry over dogs. But for someone so admittedly lonely like I am, it's like losing a part of me. My heart slowly and painfully deteriorates too, whenever I see them, especially Luhan, suffering from seizures and convulsions. I'm suffering too.

My dogs are my best, best friends. They're my most favorite companions because to be honest, they're much more sensitive than any other human being I know. Whenever I'm sad, they'll come to me and lick my legs and just jump in glee. They're ready to provide all the comfort they can give their master, without me asking for it. They don't ask. They don't complain. They just love.

And they know love better than any human being.

And now that they're terminally ill, I fear. I've witnessed enough deaths this year, and I don't want three more. I know saying goodbye would be inevitable, but I think now's too early... especially for Luhan. I know there's still Kai but those three other dogs are special to me too.

How despaired will I be if they leave?



St. Francis of Assisi, St. Roque... Please pray for us. :'(

Those Children Within Us

I don't know what to feel whenever I see young children wearing their school uniforms. It excites me to see them actually attending school (mainly because I want everyone in the country to be educated); but at the same time, it makes me nostalgic and envious because I know I can never be like them again.

When I was a kid, I've always wanted to grow up fast. I want to be an adult to escape the being 'overprotective' of my parents over me. I wanted to make my own decisions, do things my own pace and in accordance to my own discretion.

Admittedly, I failed to enjoy school as much as it didn't enjoy me. I blame myself partly for all the regretful things I've been through back then. If I didn't hurry into becoming an adult, I could have created better memories to relish now. 

But obviously, it's all too late.

Right now, I just want to be a student again, who only thinks about examinations and other academic stuffs. I just want to be a student again, who believes that the biggest problem is when you get a grade in the line of 7. 

Being an adult is currently taking its toll on me. You see, all the responsibilities which I'm never ready for are dumping themselves like I'm some kind of Wonderwoman. This year had been so challenging, and I'm feeling like I'm this (-) close to giving up. 

But I know that I shouldn't. I can't.

Life, despite being so difficult and harsh on adults like me, is still a vast dimension of opportunities. Whether we're all kids or already adults, we are still entitled to different chances to be happy. We are all at liberty to create more memories which we can cherish in the future... and make friends like how these children in the pictures did. 

It is just normal to wish to be young again; but what we fail to realize is that we all remain as children, in one way or another. Inside, there's still this 5-year old us who are ready to come out as soon as we permit it. 

Yes, for our inner child to come out, we need to let it.

I know most of you are familiar with Naruto. He's a ninja of the Konoha Village who was condemned (for the lack of better word) because sealed inside him is the Kyubi, a nine-tailed monster which has the greatest power among the nine beasts in the world of ninjas. He was devious, cunning, short-tempered and hard to control... but Naruto managed to tame him, and we all eventually learned that he has a name - Kurama.

Now how does that relate to this? I personally think that the situation of Naruto and Kurama is similar to the situation of everyone so obsessed with adulthood. We condemn ourselves because of the child within us, thinking that if we unleash that, the world will judge us for not acting our age. But you see, what gives power to our being adult is actually our childhood. We look at it like it's something that should be kept hidden, along with the secrets and mistakes that we committed in the past.

But you see, it has a name. It is us. So why should we get ashamed? Like Kurama, the children within us have reasons why they did whatever they did before. If only we learn how to accept it... If only we learn how to just let go of the past and live in the present for the future...

We can all be kids again because that part of us never left. Even though faced with so many adult problems in life, we can always go back to who were when we were younger. Most times, it helps. Believe me.

Tully's Coffee (Valenzuela)

After a grueling day of work, my body succumbed to tiredness and convinced my mind that I am in need of a break. So hitting two birds at one throw, I asked my bestfriend to come with me to Tully's Coffee in Valenzuela. It's a cute coffee shop, a first in the city as far as I know, located just across the Valenzuela City Hall in Malinta. 

Tully's Coffee is a nice place for some quiet, if you ask me. The atmosphere is really comfortable. The interior's cozy, and I attribute much of it to the soft light the place used. There's free Wi-Fi, although I didn't use it. And the range of product prices are lower than the typical coffee shops. 

Armed with an excellent camera, I took the opportunity to snap some photos hoping that it could promote the establishment in one way or another.

Do Cheaters Deserve Second Chances?

So there had been this fairly huge drama that had happened a while ago at our house. My cousin, who was cheated by her husband was here. The man was also here. My dad acted as a bridge, with hope to settle things between the two. But my cousin was adamant (thankfully!) not to get back with the person. And I can't help but abhor him, for hurting my ate; and I can't help but hate his father for trying to cover up for the 'mistakes' of his son.

Here's a summary: My cousin got pregnant and being a 'responsible man' that he made us believe that he was, the person married her. Prior to the marriage, this man was in a relationship with a girl for three years already; but he said everything has ended between them. And so the marriage happened. Unknown to us, for the past two years, a lot of problems had been happening between the couple. For numerous times, the guy won't come home, saying he's staying in his parents' house. Whenever my cousin calls her in-laws, the parents will say their son is already sleeping. It is only just recently that she discovered that whenever she thinks that her husband's at their own home, he would actually be in the girl's house - and his parents knew that.

Last week, my cousin was tipped off by someone that her husband was in the house of the woman. With her brother, she went there and she discovered that he was, in fact, there. But much to her dismay, her so-called husband didn't come out to meet him, afraid that her brother would physically hurt him. Such a fucking coward, if you ask me. 

Now, my cousin and her children left their old house. And the fucker came to my father for help.I heard the alibis, but nothing sounded convincing. Nevertheless, the meeting a while ago was arranged.

I tell you, it was so annoying the whole time he was pretending to cry, pleading for forgiveness. He was such a liar that his statements are so coherent. First, he admitted he was wrong; and then he would deny it. When my cousin brought out her evidences, he even denied that he didn't know the girl, considering that he was all smiles in their anniversary pictures. 

My blood boils even just the thought of it. Especially when I remember how easy the girl looked in those photos.

I know I'm just a cousin and I am not in the position to react this way. But how to not hate on cheaters? How to not see the worst side of it? 

Even if it's not my cousin, I would still hate on him. He was cornered already, and yet he's still finding his way out through lies. He was treating us all like idiots, to what? To save his and his family's face. My cousin was firm on her decision not to get back with that fucker. I told her I won't talk to her anymore if her decision changes.

My mother was furious at me for such statement. She told me to be an instrument for peace and the man should be forgiven. Sure, when time comes, he will be forgiven. He deserves that at least as a person. But does he deserve a second chance? 

A BIG FAT NO.

There's no excuse for cheating, because there is a lot of ways to avoid that. If there's a problem between a couple, talk about it and settle things. If talking doesn't work, then end things properly. Relationship, especially marital, problems aren't reasons to do this kind of fuckery. There is simply no excuses when one decides to be a bastard and cheat on his/her partner. That's pure disrespect towards the dignity of the other. It's a crime. 

I know men are born polygamous; but there's a limit to that. Women can accept if their men would look at others girls, but if it starts to hurt, that's where everything goes wrong. Worse, if it already hurts and the guy still won't stop, that's the torturous part. 

Cheating isn't a mistake caused by temptation. Maybe, at first, yes. But if it gets repetitive, it becomes a choice; and that's what disgusts me. A man choosing to hurt his partner is something I will never ever let pass. 

Because you know, the pain of being cheated on hurts like hell. 

Here's why:

When a girl is cheated on, she feels hate at first. But eventually, it turns into something more serious. She begins to hate herself. 

What guys don't know about the psychological effect of their cheating is that it often challenges the girls' self-esteems. It makes us think that we're not beautiful, or sexy, or rich, or just good enough that our partner had to look for someone else. We try to look within us what our mistakes had been, and then even though it's not right, the weaker ones among us end up blaming themselves for what had happened. 

Worse, the victims would develop a strong fear for trusting others. That's the scariest of all, because not many have the idea of how difficult to live life doubting everyone.

Believe me. Cheating doesn't just ruin a relationship. It ruins a life, a future. It wounds its victim deep, and scars will remain producing so much fear. 

...

Call me biased or whatever; but I honestly think that cheating is just like Pringles. Once you pop, you can't stop. That's why I don't think this kind of people deserves second chances. Because there's no more assurance, and that's one important thing to keep a relationship alive.